were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
As soon as the clock wound down to zero, she declared "HALF-TIME HEAD" and pulled down my pants. After the swallow, she said "BEER CHASER," got me a new one, and asked if she could make me a sandwich. Pretty sure she's lobbying hard for a ring.
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
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