Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
We had to coat check the pizza.
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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