whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
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