After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
Randomize