Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
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