i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
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