worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
Randomize
