curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
You can't just leave with hair like that
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
I have tasted many bathrooms
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
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