How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
Randomize