its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
Randomize
