i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
Randomize
