tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Randomize
