Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
Randomize
