If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
Randomize