Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
Randomize
