Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize
