Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
did i just see you in the movie theater carrying a margarita into Frozen?
All the 6 year olds are jealous of my alcohol
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
