This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
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