just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
While the bouncer was checking my purse, he found a bag of pasta noodles in it and asked me why I put them in my purse. I said to him: "So the guy knows I can cook."
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Randomize