He asked to "fluff my boner.."
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
Randomize
