I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Randomize
