And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
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