We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Randomize
