We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
Randomize
