If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
Randomize
