You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
So I'm really hungover walking to work and these douches from comcast on bikes ask if they can take a picture with me to show that they're doing their job. The picture: me, this chick from comcast, i'm holding a 2 ft. pixie stick, a comcast flyer and i'm puking in the parking lot. sounds like their doing a good job!
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
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