I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
I'm drive I can fine osifer
That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
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