That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Randomize
