You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
Randomize
