Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
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