if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
i was born a porn star she said
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
