One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
Randomize
