I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Randomize
