We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
i think im in europe. pls send help
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
Randomize
