Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
Randomize
