i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
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