Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
Please don't give away my fajitas
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
Randomize
