I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
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