what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
Randomize