Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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