hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
Randomize