we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize
