If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
It's just like the Real World with babies
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Randomize
