Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
Randomize
