Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
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