she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize
