It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
Randomize
