Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
She even gives head with a lisp.
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
Randomize
