I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
I just had sex on a roof
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
where are my pants?
in the oven.
that may or may not have been my penis.
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
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