On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
