i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
Randomize
