that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Randomize
